Leisure Suit Larry Final Source Set
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RM34.MSG
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RM34.MSG
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[messages for room 34 -- rmInsideChapel
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[ "Leisure Suit Larry in the Land of the Lounge Lizards"
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[ by Al Lowe
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%message 1
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"You are in a quickie marriage parlor.
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A flashing neon sign on the rear wall asks:
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\"Why wait? Marry the girl of your dreams, today!
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You provide the girl, we'll do the rest for only $100!!\""
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%message 2
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"Fawn is waiting for you at the altar. Go for it, Larry!"
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%message 3
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"The minister intones in his basso voice..."
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%message 4
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"\"Dearly beloved, we are gathered together today in the sight of,
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er, ah, um... each other,
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to enter these two people into the eternal bonds of marriage.\""
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%message 5
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"\"But before we really get rollin', I'd like to say a few words.\n\n
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Many's the marriage that I've performed here, in this little chapel,
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wearing this cheap suit, before those shiny plastic-covered pews,
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with these electric candles,
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looking at those genuine plexiglas stained-glass windows,
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for these measly few bucks...\""
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%message 6
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"(He pauses for another nip from his pocket flask.)"
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%message 7
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"\"Where was I?\" he hiccups."
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%message 8
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"\"Digressing,\" you answer."
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%message 9
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"\"Oh, well, have you got a ring?\" he asks."
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%message 10
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"\"Yep,\" you reply. \"She's wearing it.\""
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%message 11
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"\"Good enough for me! Have you got a hundred bucks?\""
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%message 12 [ Skip to message 21, if dollars > 100
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"\"Of course,\" you reply, forking over your dough."
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%message 13
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"\"Not me,\" you reply. \"I thought this was a temple of love!\""
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%message 14
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"\"Sorry, buddy, you two are SOL until you can come back here with
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100 cold, hard ones!\" he says indignantly, as he pushes between you
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and heads for the door."
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%message 15
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"Well, Larry, it looks like you're going to have to leave your new bride
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waiting at the altar, while you generate a little positive cash flow!"
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%message 16
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"As you leave, she says, \"Hurry back, Larry, I don't know how long I
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can wait before I have you!\""
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%message 17
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"\"By the way, Larry,\" she asks. \"What does SOL stand for?\""
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%message 18
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"\"Why, Sierra On-Line, I presume!\" you respond."
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%message 19
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"(Drum fill)"
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%message 20
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"\"Wait here, Fawn baby! I'll be back in a flash!!\""
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%message 21
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"\"Ok, close enough.
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I now pronounce you man and wife, till death do you part,
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or until you get tired of each other,
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per the currently acceptable social standards!\""
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%message 22
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"\"You may kiss the bride,\" he says,
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scurrying out the door to refill his flask."
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%message 23
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"\"Not now; that can wait,\" Fawn says with a smile.
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\"I'll meet you at the Casino Hotel's honeymoon suite,
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and give you a lot more than kisses, my big, strong, handsome sweetheart!!\""
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%message 24
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"\"Hey!\" you shout, \"Wait for me!!\""
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%message 25
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"Somehow this entire ceremony was less than you expected.
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The sacred bonds of marriage certainly get tied loosely in this joint!"
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%message 26
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"It's customary to position yourself to the bride's right."
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%message 27
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"\"So... shall we try again?\""
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%message 28
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"You can't see through the \"stained glass\" windows.
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They're fake, like everything else about this place."
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%message 29
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"Seems like everything here is covered in plastic."
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%message 30
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"The plastic covers are so slick, you'd probably slide right off."
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%message 31
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"Perhaps you should find a mate, mate!"
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%message 32
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"You can barely tell they're made from pressed sawdust."
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%message 33
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"Who'd want them?"
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%message 34
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"He looks a lot like his brother,
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the bad comedian in the Lizard Lounge."
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%message 35
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"\"Make up your mind, son. Time is money!\""
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%message 36
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"\"Don't stand around talking, Larry,\" says Fawn. \"Let's get married!!\""
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%message 37
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"What an old romantic!"
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%message 38
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"You wonder why Michelangelo didn't use dropped fluorescents on
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his big ceiling job."
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%message 39
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"It's not your birthday!"
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